3 MORE WEEKS!

MDM WONG ISN'T COMING BACK FOR THE NEXT THREE WEEKS.

I HAVE NO IDEA WHETHER TO BE HAPPY OR SAD.

There's a sec 1 boy living one floor above mine and he waited for me downstairs today before going school. I'm quite suspicious of his intentions but then again, he's only 13. It would be ok to be nice to a kid... right?

Some of them

These are my students who don't attend Mother Tongue periods in school, so I take them out to the concourse for Mathematics. [This means I spend 6 hours more of Mathematics with them!] The most right is my smartest kid who is also a Korean. The one directly on my left [MY LEFT!] is the jolliest student ever, the same one who tagged my blog a few days ago. The Korean student is holding a red bottle, a candy bottle in the shape of a fire extinguisher. I gave it to one of my Math rep and he filled it with water immediately, cos it a kid' toy which can be used to spray water, and started fooling around. But I didn't regret giving it to him, seeing him and other students playing around with water was such a sight. Kids these days hardly have any childhood.

I guess these Mother-tongue-turn-math students will be the more memorable ones when I leave.

Teaching must be a calling

Many of my students keep asking me when I'm going to leave. Well.. I kinda know, but not very sure about it. I actually am quite sick of teaching a bunch of brats, raising my voice constantly to compete with the incredible noise. Most of all, I hate myself when I lose my temper and I vent my frustration on the kids. Like today, I stopped teaching for half an hour cos I was simply pissed off.

And then, there is the marking. After marking, I still need to chase the students who have not handed in their work. And currently, I'm in really bad shape, apparently, I'm supposed to collect their math files to show Mdm Wong what they have been doing. OH NO.

Enough of the gripes already. I could go on all day but I better not. On a happier note, I must say I've made some good friends with my students. However, I do notice it's the boys who like to disturb me. I have chatted with some of the girls but I find few friends among them.

When it comes to favoritism, I'm not sure if I practise it openly. Yeah, there are students whose academic ability is so high that I always praise them, especially my Koream students. But it's with a consciousness that I stop myself from putting anyone down. After teaching for some time, I don't think I'll ever condemn a teacher for calling a child stupid, even if it's my child. Nobody is really at fault here. In times like this, both sides struggle and the occasional burst of not so nice speech ensues.

We cannot wish for every child to be bright and every teacher to be patient and willing.

A testy Week

One of my students is hospitalized now cos there was a fight in school yesterday. :( I feel really sad about it.

A student also gave me an early farewell gift - Lancome perfume called Miracle. MYMYMY! Well, he owes me big cos just 1 day before the test, I got him to sit down with me for nearly 2 hours for a crash course on probability. That silly boy then got 49/58 for his test. It is due to both him smart and I good. LOL.

So far, for the sec 4 tests, all has been quite alright. As I mark the Sec 3s tests over the weekend, and burn my hours away, I hope they'll do fine. PLS...

Reb's 21st

Rebekah, a wonderful close friend of mine, just celebrated her 21st on Sunday. It was an un-typical birthday part of just less than 10 (not counting the few Aunties and parents). So it was a really cozy one, unlike previous birthday parties in which the house/chalet is packed til door is bursting. And I feel happy for Reb, cos i know that this was really what she wanted. Most wouldn't feel satisfied and I admire her for wanting the alternative.

Cheers to the lady who has made my life so blessed. :)

Just leave

Hey, I'm blogging this from the staff room, how cool. I've got much much to do! But I'm just too lazy to mark all those assignments.

Today's one and only math class was the sec 3 Amath class, and boy, I felt that they were super absorbent today. There are like 3 individuals who have sort of given up on trying to understand already. I'm quite worried for them.

And I keep thinking as to how I'll not be able to see them anymore. And how should I leave them? Without warning? Any parting gift? I thought of writing cards but nah, I don't have the time. Or just leave, like that, simple.

Things I wanna do after teaching: Go for a tree top walk! Sing more and better. Meet up with old friends. READ READ READ.

SCARED SCARED SCARED!

All my classes are going to take their various Math test this week. They are not prepared! Some of them are just so slow. I'm rushing like mad to finish teaching and they keep pulling me back like backward current with really, to put it crudely, retarded questions. Don't forget that they're already in Upper Sec, cannot afford to be blur already!

I'm stressed. And it's probably my last week here too. Oh well, I'm not sure yet if I'll miss them. There's many pros and cons.

Priceless Honesty

2 boys came up to me just as I was about to prepare to leave the school. They were my very own students.

B1: Cher, we found a purse.
Me: Oh! Hmmm, got ID inside?
B1: Yeah, you know this girl? [flashed ez-link card]
Me: Nope. Give to office la. Eh, wait, you all got take any money inside not?
B2: Oi, of cos not la. Pls, we very honest. Plus you look inside, who want to steal? [3 10-cent coins]
Me: OK, give office la.
B2: Er, can you pass it to them? They sure ask question wan.
[This sentence really got me suspicious!]
Me: Huh?
B2: Aiyah, I took 50 cents la. [He then took out his wallet and put back some coins. At this point, all three of us burst out laughing. If only you could see Arif's face!]
B2: 70 cents can buy milo k!
Me: Yeah, but honesty is priceless!

After that, the other boy went to return the purse to general office.

Got a date?

Me: You know ah, my student was like asking me for REMEDIAL tomorrow, specifically at 4pm.
C[colleague]: haha, serious? Anyway, you have a date tmr?
Me: Nah, I'm single.
C: and available!
Me: No, I'm single but unavailable. haha. How about you? Any date?
C: Nope.

I have this really naughty class of 20 students cos we split them up for math. There's this irritating group of boys who love to sing. Irritating they may be, I enjoy their comic antics and and occasional outbursts of singing. [can be really disruptive.] One of them totally doesn't follow my lesson despite sitting front row.

Me: I can practically see an F grade on your O level paper already. Can you please please listen in class? You need to start working hard now!
Boy: Aiyah, i don't like maths la
Me: What do you wanna do when you grow up?
Boy: Musician!

His response wowed me. What a carefree and true response. I think I'm less clearer about it than him.

Teaching ramblings

For the first time since I started teaching, i sent people out of class today. NO MORE TOLERATING INCESSANT CHATTER! Well, actually I sent one boy out each from 2 classes. I had this conversation with this boy whom I sent out.

Me: Seriously, what do you come to school for?
BOY: study la.
Me: Well I don't see that. No, think about it, what are you in school for?
Boy: I wanna pass O Levels.
Me: haha, you don't have to study hard to pass you know? you can play all year round and still scrape through.
Boy: That's true..
Me: So, what are you in school for?

I'm doing Probability for Sec 4 math now and it's so tough teaching it! What comes to me so intuitively is just so hard to pass it on. And boy, the Probability they learn now is so hard! For my Sec 3s, their foundation in Math is quite weak, I can hardly stand well on what I'm teaching.

Now I've gotta mark a whole stack of assignments. They're all scrambled all over the place. I'm terrified even to start.

Music Ministry

Being in the Music Ministry in Bethel Assembly of God has always been a privilege. It is God and not man that has chosen me to serve in this area. Joining vocals since I was 15 has been great and I'm glad I have never looked back. But over the past years, I have seen many come and leave within the vocals itself and it's sad to see commitment take on a whole new different meaning.

I have many frustrations about the music ministry, the band and probably most of all, the vocals. To voice them all out here would be utmost politically incorrect and not to mention, so un-glorifying to God.

If a bad sound system is truly the reason why we're so capped in our capabilities, then God, pls let us have our new building soon.

How to have meaningful gatherings

For families that truly gather once in a blue moon[like mine la], events such as Chinese New Year can be both a joy and pain. That's because we have to spent several hours in the company of virtually strangers and the conversation that flies over my head will belong to the adults. Well, I stand no longer for such insipid gatherings!

It's not that I don't have close cousins, I do! Or rather, I used to. Well, we just happened to find ourselves more grown up now and more distant. Coincidentally, a lot of my cousins are the quiet type. So Ms Han here decided to quit being an ass and just go all out to talk.

For starters, at my maternal grandfather's side, I kinda got everyone to start playing Bridge. 3 people learned bridge that day! My cold distant cousins were actually laughing and we started doing the usual crapping and joking. [An accomplishment, really!]

For my Dad's side on 'Chu Er', i realised for the first time that within the generation of cousins, there were 3 generations. [HUH?!] Firstly, there's the working and married cousins gen, followed by mine which is the tertiary education gen. The last of course are the little kids, whom have taken a particular liking to me as I'd like to believe as they keep asking me to play with them.

I know how most of us really hate the superficial questions like 'How are you?' etc. But I think such conversations can go far if you truly learn to be curious about your relatives. With the adults, the common question from me is, "So, are you happy with your job?" Given the really sincere way I ask it, I wonder if they're rattled by my question. I mean, I would be rattled by that question. To sidetrack abit...

I'm not very happy with my job. Correct that, I'm not happy with my students, their work and how half of a particular sec 4 class treat me. But upon further reflection, I found it was not my circumstances but it's really my attitude. [super philosophical right?] I can continue dreading my days and treat my students like trash, which, honestly, I'll be good at given my occasional snobbish attitude. Or I can rejoice in the day that the Lord has made and with all joy, give all that I can WHILE I can. Of cos la, easier said than done.

Back to CNY, I'm pretty happy about it this year. I should resolve to keep in better contact with my cousins. I mean, we're no longer kids, we don't have to rely upon our parents to set up the meetings for us. No matter what people say about friends, blood is always thicker than water. What's friends if you can't connect with your own cousins?

Going once, going twice, sold!

Encouraging experimentation is the theme for BNSS this year, hence they decided to try out auctioning to celebrate Chinese New Year for today's celebrations. Two weeks ago, every class had to submit a hamper which they have prepared and out of all these, eight would be selected via onlne voting. The starting bid for the selected hampers varied from $18 to $28. Because the hampers essentially only contained sweets and chocolates, if you ignore how pretty they looked, you wouldn't think the students would bid more than $20 for each hamper right? Plus the students at BNSS are far from rich.

Wrong! The students were gamed for auctions! Other than a freakish bid by a student's parent of $1000, the highest bid for a hamper was $400 by a student. Other prices went as high as $188. JUST FOR A HAMPER? Well you could say that it was all in the name of charity. During the celebrations, I sat with my students on the floor and I'm pretty sure I was the only one who did that. Haha. One of my favourite students is an Indo Chinese, so initially we decided to come up with $30 each, together with another Indo as well, so we thought we could bid up to $100. But alas, the bids were far beyond $150 so we gave up. :(

I think.. I like Singapore

Jasudasen [Singapore High Commission to Malaysia]: ... If above all you think you have a passion for Singapore, do really consider applying for the scholarship in MFA.

If ever I forget what transpired at the MFA tea session, I would just remember the above statement. I'm not sure if I really love Singapore since I never really sang the National Anthem in my schooling days and had pon last year's National Day eve's celebration at VJ. But I think I have a heart for Singaporeans and I totally love our uniqueness. Many out there think that the slogan 'Uniquely Singapore' is cheesy, ok I concede it is a little, but it kinda does capture who we really are. Just go watch the 10-min film 'Cut' on Youtube by Roystan Tan, the kinda humour inside and lingo used can only be understood by locals, and then you know what i mean when i say i think Singapore is really unique.

I was in Hongkong at the beginning of January. And I learnt through my friend who brought us around that HongKong adopts extreme capitalism. As a result, even housing for most people is not directly provided by the government. What the HK gvt does is sell the land... to tycoons of course, who will build apartments and rent them at high prices. HongKong has a 70% rate of people living in rented flats while in Singapore it's 70% of us who live in our very own flats. My point is this, I love the way most things work around here. Yes, for us who think we know better, life can sometimes be too restrictive. But most of us still don't realise how sheltered and protected we are, therefore when the tiniest crises come up, we blame everyone but ourselves.

Coming back to my main point, I like Singapore. I'd go as far to say that the Ministry of Foreign Affairs would be the only ministry I'll be interested to work in. After all, foreign service is 'about the nation and never about you'. I'd say that working in the private sector would be a lot more glamorous and monetarily rewarding, but admit it, it would be hard to be people-centred when the way you're working it's all about making sure YOU get the promotion. Like what Janice said, there has to be a purpose to what you're doing everyday.